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Russell Hyken Russell Hyken, Ph.D.
Ed.S, M.A., LPC, NCC
Educational Diagnostician
Educational / Therapeutic-
Placement Specialist
314-691-7640
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Video
Wed
08.24

Dealing With Sensitive Teens

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Some teens are most sensitive than others and present a special challenge for parents. Dr. Russell Hyken addressed the issue on KTVI-TV, Fox 2 in St. Louis, Missouri.

Thu
08.11

Kids & Lying

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Kids do lie to their parents and others from an early age. However, the fact it is happening may not be all bad and is a symptom of other issues. Dr. Hyken discussed this topic on KTVI-TV Fox 2 in St. Louis, MO.

Mon
08.08

Ladue News Article: Back-to-School Anxiety

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Summer is over and you child’s mood has shifted: He is not the happy, carefree kid of a few short weeks ago; rather, he has become irritable, complains about headaches and is having sleep difficulties. Welcome to back-to-school stress.

While they may not show it, most students experience back-to-school anxiety at some level. Seeing your child on the edge of nervousness can be a parentally painful situation. But relax and understand that anxiety is an inevitable part of life in today’s society.

In fact, if one does not feel occasional moodiness, that is actually a bigger problem than situational stress. Furthermore, stress can be a positive thing. Good stress motivates and energizes, pushing students to do their best work, and good stress helps kids face challenges and develop strategies for success. Bad stress, on the other hand, causes kids to become overwhelmed: Bad stress is distress. The savvy student, however, can identify and confront these overwhelming feelings, especially if parents provide appropriate support.

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Thu
08.04

Preparing Your Freshman For College

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Parents are now preparing to send their teens away from home to begin freshman year at college. Dr. Russell Hyken recently provided some tips on that process on KTVI-TV, Fox 2 in St. Louis, MO.

 

Sun
07.24

Kids and Cursing

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Parents are often surprised when their teens use curse words and wonder where they got that kind of language. Dr. Hyken addressed that issue on KTVI-TV Fox 2 in St. Louis, MO.

Tue
07.12

Strategies for a Profanity Free Home

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I remember the first time I heard my child use a swear word. He did not know what it meant, and its context was so funny I laughed. Seeing my reaction, my son, who was just three years old at the time, decided to not just say it again, but sing it at the top of his lungs. Once I pulled my composure together, my parenting sense kicked in, and I told my son he is not use that word again.

Unfortunately, cursing is becoming more common place in our society. A recent survey commissioned by Care.com found that eighty-six percent of parents believe that the current generation of children are cursing more and using inappropriate language at an earlier age than when they were kids.

Why do kids curse? For younger children it is just part of language learning. They don’t understand “taboo” words and mimic speech and phrases that they hear. As children get older, they hear this language at the playground, on cable television, in their music, and at the movies. Due to peer pressure, a desire to impress their friends, or to be part of the group, these inappropriate sayings start getting more use.

Parents need to take control of this situation. Different ages, however, deserve different rules and explanations. Typically, until around age six, kids should be told to not use those words and that they are bad. No further clarification is needed. As kids get older and can understand more abstract concepts, more explanation is warranted. This often means defining words along with a serious talk about how to appropriately express feelings.

As kids enter the teen years, when cursing peaks, drawing appropriate boundaries becomes the issue. Teens will use profanity around their peers and there is nothing a parent can do about it except monitor the situation and set some ground rules. Angst ridden adolescents should never cuss at school, around adults, or in public. Also, their language, while bad, should be an expression of frustration or an appropriately used adjective; it should not be part of a mean, angry attack on another peer. If these types of rants frequently occur, it is not only unacceptable, but it may also be the sign of a bigger problem.

Lastly, parents need to set the example and stop cussing themselves. Below are some strategies to assist with making your household profanity free.
• Just Say No – tell your children curse words are not acceptable. Consider brainstorming some more acceptable words that can be used in their place.
• Be Honest – if you child hears you cuss and calls you out, explain that you struggle with this issue. It will have the added bonus of making your child feel like he is facing an adult problem.
• Create Consequences – add a chore around the house or take away screen time. Tell your child up front so he or she knows what to expect.
• The Swear Jar – create a financial penalty for the use of profanity. Typically parents put “way” more money in the jar than the kids. Then use the cash for a fun family activity.
• Correct Guests- if you hear a guest swear, ask them politely not to use those words. If they persist, pull them aside and explain that you are trying to teach your children those words are not acceptable.
• Beware of TV and Movies. – even when you think your young child is not paying attention, they probably are.
• Check in with the Babysitter – many teens curse unconsciously when they are talking or texting on their phones. If you feel this is your babysitter, ask her to refrain. Most will politely comply.
*Some of the above strategies are taken from Care.com

Wed
06.29

Traveling With Teens Video

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Traveling with teens during a summer family vacation may be getting difficult as the kids get older. Dr. Hyken offered some tips on how to deal with that issue recently on KTVI-TV Fox 2 in St. Louis.

Fri
06.17

Allowance Or Obligation For Children Video

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Most parents give their teens an allowance for spending money. However, it is important to think through how much, when and for what. Dr. Hyken addressed these issues on KTVI-TV Fox 2 in St. Louis MO.

Thu
06.02

Ladue News Article: Giving Teens a Safe, Sane, Productive Summer

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Summer is often a time the kids are aimless and the whole family gets irritable as a result. It need not be that way. Dr. Hyken offered insights on a safe, sane summer for the family in this article for The Ladue News.

As I reflect upon my youth and those lazy days of summer, I have fond memories of staying out late, spending hours by the pool, and making many phone calls to determine the when and the where of my next nightly activity. Yes, those were simpler times without worries of curfew laws, skin cancer and Wi-Fi access.

Read Full Article Here…

Download as a PDF

Fri
05.13

Teens & Summer Jobs

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Most parents want to see their teens get a summer job. Not all teens agree. Dr. Hyken addressed the issue on KTVI-TV Fox 2 in St. Louis…

 
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