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    Archive for November, 2009

    Teen Behavior - Postive Risk Taking

    Sunday, November 22nd, 2009

    Recently a Kansas City, Kansas beloved middle school teacher was fired for making an inappropriate comment in the classroom.  The teacher made a “bad” joke that pushed the limit of acceptable classroom banter.

    What happened next, however, was truly unique. Upon hearing that the teacher was suspended, his eighth grade students came together to protest. Utilizing modern day technology such as texting and Facebook, they organized more than fifty kids to picket the school, gathered parents to attend district meetings, and created a 200 plus person fan page on Facebook to support their cause. These tenacious, tech savvy teens took on the system!

    Behaviorally, these students involved themselves in a positive risk taking exercise. Risk-taking, in general, refers to the tendency to engage in behaviors that may potentially be harmful or dangerous, yet, at the same time, provide the opportunity for some kind of perceived positive outcome.  More often we hear about teenagers who engage in negative risky behaviors such as drug and alcohol use; however, there are also many students like the ones described above who push limits by participating in positive risk taking activities such as protesting for a cause.

    What is so unique about positive risk taking is that it can be a powerful and transformational process that encourages more positive behavior. In fact, teens who engage in these types of risks are more likely to avoid alcohol, drugs, and other dangerous activities than teens who do not push themselves to try new and appropriate things (Teens Today, 2004). Encourage your teens to step outside their comfort zone and see the postive benefits that result. 

    Interested in how the story ends, read the Kansas City Star newspaper article , who interviewed me to discuss the psychology and motivation of these unique teens who took on the system.

    Acceptable Anxiety vs. Anxiety Disorder

    Saturday, November 14th, 2009

    Anxiety is an inevitable part of life in today’s society. It is important to understand that there are many life situations in which anxiety, stress, or a little fear is an appropriate and reasonable reaction. If you don’t ever feel any anxiety in response to everyday challenges, something may be wrong. In fact anxiety can, in some cases, be a positive thing. Good stress motivates and energizes pushing you do your best work. A little fear may actually cause you
    to work harder and be more productive.

    Anxiety disorders are distinguished from everyday, normal anxiety in that they involve anxiety/stress that is more intense (panic attacks), lasts longer (don’t go away after the stressful situation has passed), and  may lead to phobias and other life impairing issues. When this occurs, it is time to see a professional.

    Teen Parenting- Celebrating Holidays with Divorced Parents

    Saturday, November 14th, 2009

    Holidays are tricky times for divorced families. For parents, it can be troublesome knowing your teen is enjoying special moments with the other parent. For your teen, a juggled schedule between families can be very disruptive and disheartening. 

    Despite the challenges that come with celebrating holidays in a split family, these tips can help ensure that your family still enjoys a wonderful holiday season:

    Successful scheduling. Consider what events are most important and respect that teens may have special requests, such as attending certain family parties or continuing a long-standing family tradition. Map it out and see what works. 

    Give well wishes and be fully supportive to your teen when he is with the other side of the family. Saying you miss him might be misunderstood and make him feel guilty for not being with you.  Ask about his plans for the day and be sure to tell him to enjoy it!

    Think creatively when it comes to gifts. If possible, collaborate with your ex so as to avoid duplicate gifts.  Or, consider splitting high cost items to show that both parents can come together for the good of your child.

    Finally, create new memories so that the old ones aren’t missed. It’s about starting anew and coming up with fresh, new memories that your child can always look fondly back upon.

     
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